I was puzzled. “Why, what happens when you stand up?”, I asked my client on the other end of the phone (who I had never seen in person).

“Well, then they can see how short I am. And I really lose confidence because of my short height.”

“What’s your height?”, I asked him.

CLIENT: “5 feet 4.”

ME: “And what does that mean?”

CLIENT: “It means I’m shorter than most men. And when I STAND in a group of people I just don’t feel good enough. I feel inferior.”

I was taken aback because I was talking to one of the TOP FIVE banking professionals in the country.. one of those industry legends !!!

ME: “No. You are 5 feet 4 means you are… FIVE FEET FOUR. And that’s that. That’s the only ‘reality’ here. Nothing more. Nothing less. You are 5 feet 4 means NOTHING. It doesn’t mean you’re short or not short. It doesn’t mean you’re not good enough (or good enough). It means NOTHING. It just means that you’re 5 feet 4. And that’s that.”

That was on a Friday like this one, two years ago. That weekend our friend abandoned his half a dozen high heel shoes and attended two parties wearing regular flat shoes where he kept standing (and telling himself “I’m 5 feet 4 and that’s that. ) He’s never lost confidence because of his height ever again. An end to almost 3 decades of suffering.

———

We all have ‘stories’ about our height and our weight and our looks.. and our 12th standard marks.. and our bank balances.. and our cars… and the nonsense that’s printed on our visiting cards. It’s time to abandon those stories, focus on what is REAL and restore the power we’ve lost to those stories.

And that’s that!

P.S. I use the phrase THAT’S THAT a lot to sort out life. Like “Uddhav Thackeray became CM and that’s that. ” It’s an Adam Sandler dialogue from Punch Drunk Love.