As part of my coaching practice, I often come across situations where a Client is in a blissfully happy state and wants to stay in that state forever. Who doesn’t want to? But for some reason that state doesn’t last. Here’s what I have come to understand of how life works and WHY it works that way.
First – an exercize for your mind. Remember the genie and the magic lamp story? Imagine YOU have the magic lamp, you rub the magic lamp and out comes the genie.
“Your wish is my command”, says the genie. You ask the genie for whatever you want. A bigger house, a bigger car, more money or whatever else it is that you desire. The genie gives it to you and goes back into the lamp. The next day you remember a few more things and the day after a few more and everytime you remember something you get what you want from the genie.
Does that sound like a happy and contented life or does it sound like a boring, monotonous life? I guess after a while you’ll be asking the genie for more problems, more challenges, something that creates meaning and purpose for your life.
To me, a perpetually happy state is meaningless.
That’s like wearing your best dress 24 by 7! Your best dress is your best dress because you have other dresses that you don’t like that much. Those other dresses are critical because they serve as a reference point. Those dresses are special because THEY are the ones because of which your best dress is the BEST! If all you had was your best dress, it would be just a dress. NOT A BEST DRESS!
Happiness and Sadness are complimentary values. If you didn’t know how it feels to be sad, you wouldn’t know how it feels to be happy!
When something is rare, difficult to get, it has a special value. Imagine if you had the Midas touch and everything you touched turned to gold. Even IMAGINING something like that kills the craving for gold.
Life is full of complimentary values.
Without the dark night, you wouldn’t experience the beauty of sunrise.
Without a few failures, success won’t taste as sweet.
Without a scorching hot day, you wouldn’t enjoy a refreshingly cold drink or a cold shower as much.
And for those of you who meditate, you’ll realize that that blissful early morning silence and serenely calm mind is most valuable on a day when you expect to deal with all sorts of stress.
You know why it feels so good when the Indian cricket team thrashes Pakistan?
It wouldn’t have felt so good if Miandad hadn’t thrashed us in the first place!
Remember, sometimes it’s heads, sometimes it’s tails.
It’s okay to WANT to be happy all the time.
It’s even more okay to understand that Life is a package deal.
A Buy 1 Get 1 Free bundled offer.
You want something, you have to accept whatever else comes with it.
If you don’t accept life the way it is, LIFE WINS!
________________________________________